Wednesday, July 20, 2011

How YOU Doin'?

This morning I was driving to work and jamming to some new Matt Nathanson when I encountered one of "those" guys. You know the kind. The ones that make you shake your head and wonder what part of their behavior could possibly be considered attractive?

 Ok. So, anyway, I was driving along. And I'm pretty sure I wasn't dancing around in my car or singing exuberantly - although it wouldn't be terribly out of character if I did either thing.  I stopped at a stoplight and had that funny feeling I was being watched. Looking to my right, I see me the "How you doin'" smile. He obviously thought this was going to somehow attract my attention. (Good thing I was wearing my sunglasses, so he didn't see my look of disdain.)

As I drove away, shaking my head to myself, I began to ponder the way those "creeper"-type guys behave. Does it actually WORK sometimes? One of my guy friends has said, "Yeah - guys have to be really careful with the smile. You can't smile too long or too big because then the girl thinks you're creepy."  And I'd have to agree with that. But I can deal with the enthusiasm of a creepy smile a lot better than I can some of the ridiculous things others do.  I mean...I can think of a number of examples off the top of my head that could not possibly work on even the most desperate of females.

Take for example the guy in the beat up hooptie with the busted out windshield not long ago. Not only did he practically wiggle his eyebrows at me as he turned in front of my car; the guy SALUTED me and gave me a lecherous-looking gummy grin. Ummm......really? Sure...give me some of THAT, big boy. Blech.

Or how about the guy at Starbucks (not a local one) that kept trying to get into my line of vision and make eye contact. That wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't sitting on the sofa to begin with. I almost busted out laughing as he wiggled around trying to get me to give him some kind of "YES" sign. If I wasn't the polite Southern girl type, I'd have rolled my eyes and stared him down. Instead, I tried to ignore his little sofa dance - and quickly exited the building when my coffee was read.

And don't tell me that it's some sort of flattery. That it's because of my amazing beauty. We all know that's not the case. Creepers just like to creep. They aren't THAT discerning. It's all about getting the attention. that I think about it....I guess they win. Because they are getting my attention. One way or the other. *barf*


Canadian Pam said...

yeah but you are pretty too! Don't under estimate yourself! If I were a guy, I'd hit on you too! Heck, maybe I still will *nudge nudge wink wink* LOL

Chris said...

The poor guys, they just don't know how to behave when they see you.......and you are an amazingly beautiful person! :)

Kerry said...

Yes, it actually works! We're going on 14 years of wedded bliss!

Charee said...

Oh gosh... Kerry.... Not funny!!

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