To the Future…

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud... It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always endures. Love never fails." ~1 Corinthians 13:4ish - 8ish

When we lost Kerry, I believed I'd lost the only great love I'd ever have - because who gets more than one?! That seems almost greedy to believe I even deserve it. 

Christmas 2022

I was wrong. And this isn't about Kerry. (But I had to get that out of the way.)

This is about Kyle. 

Right around the time I quit being mad at God, I ran into an old friend from my college days. He stopped me as I was walking by - we talked the rest of the night - and we haven't missed a beat since. He'd tell you that he knew within minutes that we'd be together. I'll tell you that it wasn't that fast. Either way - the outcome was the same. We fell in love, and he is more than I probably deserve. 

I gave him at least 100 reasons to run away. From my irrational concerns about moving too fast to my hyper independence, I don't think I was really a catch. For all my tough talk about moving forward, when the real deal was standing in front of me, I was terrified. And I am sure I reacted poorly more than once.

 You don't believe me, do you? Let me give you a great example.

I went for a walk with my dogs. Kyle arrived at my house at around the time he was expected. But he sat outside, where I found him as I walked up (sweaty and gross). It set me off, and I launched into a Ted talk about how I needed space. 

Not enough? How about this? One time he asked me to tell him one thing that Kerry did that annoyed me. (There is context, but it's too much to type.) I burst into tears and didn't stop for 30 minutes, because thinking about Kerry ripped my heart out, regardless of the fact that I constantly tell him stuff all the time. 

Oh - and he probably feels like he knows Kerry at this point. Because he's heard all the stories. In fact, his joke is that he wishes Kerry was his spirit guide for living with me. (We all know that the advice he'd get is "GOOD LUCK, BUDDY!")

All of that to say, the man has earned some serious stripes in the Smith house. And most of all - he loves me right where I am all the time. 

My kids love him. My dogs love him. And I love him wholeheartedly. It's amazing and seems almost impossible.  But if you meet him, you'll love him too.

I do think entering my world with friends galore, Pie Breakfast, and all of my gypsy "pack and go" ways changed his life. He'd tell you that he's never been happier and that he loves it. I think he has to feel overwhelmed sometimes. But he's handled it all perfectly, of course. If you were a fly on the wall, you'd hear him say, "I'm just here to make you happy."

He does make me happy. 

He also makes me laugh. I think the man will do anything just to get me to that "laugh till you can't breathe" phase. If you'd told me even a year ago that I'd find pure joy and laughter again, I'd have thought you lost your mind. But I have both in spades. 

Life is good. I'm good. And Kyle is a very good man.

I am excited for you to meet him. Trust me, he was worth the wait. 

(And for those who have, thank you for bringing him into the fold without reservation.)